Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Weight struggles and realizations

I don't think I ever posted a personal post before, but I think this is an issue that touches a lot of people and I think sharing makes it easier.

I've always struggled with my weight. I was a big baby who was constantly hungry. As a kid I was always the tallest one of my class till 6th grade and I was always hungry. I'm actually not that tall (1m74 or 5'8 1/2), but I did grow up faster than most kids and developed puberty younger than most girls. I'm an emotional eater.

My parents divorced when I was 8 and I kept on eating. One year later my Father left to live one year in France, I missed my dad a lot and kept on eating. Then I went to visit him and he was chocked by my weight and controlled my food. I lost around 10 pounds which is a lot for a 10 years old. Almost a year later my maternal Grandmother died of unnatural causes and I took the weight back and then some!

In my teens I lost and gained back some weight at least 3 times. I actually never knew life without the yo-yo effect. At 17 years old, I left my small town to move to Montreal for my school. I decided to lose weight and I kept it low (with a lot of variations of course) till I was around 23 years old.

At 21 years old in a shitty pub

When I was around 25 I started to gain dangerously weight, plummeting to a size 20 (22UK 50 in EU). I lost back some weight two years later and kept it stable at a size 16 till recently.

At my biggest ever at 26 years old

In November I decided to resume my weight lost and come back to a healthy weight. I lost 30 pounds (13,6 kilos) so far.


To end up on a positive note here are some realizations that are currently helping me to carry-on smoothly with the weight loss:

  • Exercise is good but doesn't make you loose weight. Your body as a tendency to compensate by spending less energy the rest of the day and making you hungry. I lost weight many many times, but never significantly by going to the gym. 
  • Diets do not work. Counting calories isn't sustainable and the weight always creeps back up. You can't succeed by being constantly hungry. 
  • If you do not loose weight one week it might be water retention, but it certainly isn't muscle gain! You do not gain a pound of muscle in a week!
  • The low fat high carb approach doesn't works for me. I need fat in order to feel full and not overeat. I'm now on a ketogenic lifestyle (similar to paleo) and it is so much easier to lose weight. 
If you are also struggling with your weight (under or over) and feel like sharing your story, I would love to hear it!



  1. I have personally haven't had this issue but I totally agree with you about how dieting doesn't really work.

  2. Aw Judith, I am so sorry to hear about your struggle with the scales :-( I've always been skinny and for that reason people seem to never take me seriously when I engage in a conversation about the struggle of losing weight because they think I don't 'get' it. But I think I do. I think it's very much like any other emotional struggle. Very difficult to overcome, and even when you do overcome it's easy to go back to your old ways. But while it's difficult I don't think it's impossible to lose weight and keep it off. I'm really happy to hear that you're in a good place right now and I am really rooting for you.

  3. I totally agree with you sweetheart.
    Maggie D
    The Indian Savage diary

  4. Aww Judith, I'm so sorry to hear about your weight struggles! I am a bit of an emotional eater, too. Stress makes me eat more. I gained 10 kilograms the first year I was in Belgium. It took me a long time to figure out I just can't process protein the way the locals do, regardless of how healthy lean protein is supposed to be. Now I eat carbs without guilt. It's the thing my body knows the best, and I never get a stomachache from it. I think it takes a lot of self-discovery to keep the weight stable, and I hope you'll learn how to manage soon!

  5. Thank you for sharing your story--I think there's very few young women who don't have food or weight issues. I hate that that's the way it is.


  6. When I was 29 I just started gaining weight like crazy. At 34 I figured out I was lactose, grain, refined sugar and gluten intolerant. When I kicked those things out of my my health was restored and I lost 10 kilos not even trying.. Good luck! :) <3

  7. Such an honest story. And it's amazing that you decided to take back control :)

    My two best friends are struggling with their weight as long as I can remember. And I see how much it can hurts them when people say stupid things or stare. I don't get poeple who do/say such things. It's not because someone doesn't fit size 0 that they are less of a person. On the contrary!

  8. No it doesn't! It's just a temporary fix!

  9. I agree with the emotional struggle! And I hate the skinny bashing, all women have insecurities, ours are not worst than others! For some it's the skin, the hair, the teeth... Thank you for your good words!

  10. Nutrition is definitely not a one size fits all approach! I'm glad you figured all what works for you! For me it's the total opposite, I'm a bottomless pit when I eat too much carbs.

  11. Yeah, I guess we are all the same!

  12. I also cutted out gluten and sugar and I'm losing weight, thanks for sharing!

  13. Some people are definitely very rude! I'm sorry for your friends!

  14. HarcrazyforcosmeticsJune 4, 2014 at 2:39 PM

    lovely post Judith.. I am quite disturbed reading it. I too was a big baby weighing so much that everybody was shocked to see a new born baby being so big.. I was always heavy for that age & was being teased by others though I was never a good eater & I am a vegetarian. I do yoga to keep myself healthy & these days stop worrying about my weight. I feel the worry makes u put on more weight. Being a South Indian I have cravings for rice & sweets, but try to eat in small portions so that I dont feel guilty at the end of the day.. Emotional stress can make one eat more & lead to obesity. So everyone who is worried about their weight should first stop worrying & take steps to stay fit & healthy

  15. I agree with you worrying is definitely unhealthy! It's bad for your heart and bad for your self esteem. Thanks for sharing your story.

  16. It was interesting to read how it has affected you throughout your life and as you know I think you're doing a good job. I had to eat paleo for a couple of months (doctor's orders because they thought I might have coeliaki.. nog the case though) and it was one of the hardest things I had to do food-wise :') but I agree with you that it certainly is a healthy lifestyle.. and I wouldn't mind applying some things.

  17. I think the rule of following it 80% of the time makes it easier, especially when you are maintaining.